Tired

My heart hurts when they leave

No matter who it is or who I see

I pour every emotion into those I’ve just met

And I never have enough to support the thoughts in my head

I love too deeply and unconditionally 

But that love never comes back, not fully, not really

I fill their glass with the tears from my heart 

Yet mines always empty, and I know that’s not smart 

But I can’t change who I am or how I react

I just keep giving and giving when what I need, I lack..

I hope that my caring or nurturing stature

Would make people care for me, maybe just pretend that I matter 

I feel every shift in emotion with the people around me 

I wish I could turn it off, it tends to drown me

With sadness or happiness or stress and anxiety 

I can never find peace in any variety

My heart sits heavy on the brink of collapse when I give out my love wanting something back

Like an addict who just tries their hardest not to relapse 

The reassurance and affirmations from others dictate my day

Like sitting in silence until someone says it’s ok 

To be happy or sad or anything in between 

I just need to know that I’m heard or maybe that I’m seen 

My heart works in this way, and I hate how its wired 

But every moment of everyday 

I’m just tired